A New Path.....

Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

Psalm 119:105

When I was about 11 years old, before I knew the Lord, I went to JOY club once a week after school at a neighborhood home.  The JOY stood for Jesus, Others & You.  Mostly, we memorized Bible verses and recited them and won little prizes.  I remember sometimes working on my verses with a friend during recess.  Psalm 119:105 was one of the first.  Isn't it cool how the Lord interweaves Himself in our lives before we even have a clue?!

So, lamps and light, and a new path.  We SO need His light.

The nutshell version of this new path is that, after conferring with my doctor, we are pursuing mycotoxin (mold poisoning) testing and treatment.  There is a lot involved with it, it's expensive, it will take endurance and perseverance on my part and a lot of counting it all joy.

We covet your prayers as we wait to hear which mold testing center is considered best by the environmental doctors, and then just for the fortitude to do this thing, as well as resources.

We know He has it covered.  We're looking for that Word-Light He has promised will light this path.

Thanks so much for praying.  We appreciate you all so much.

A little catching up.....

Well, it has been a year since the original 40 Days of Prayer was started by my dear daughter, Jessie.  Isn't that amazing?!

I've had it on my list for quite awhile to blog here and give you all an update, and today seems to be the day.

After about a year of treatment for the various issues that have been discovered (endocrine insufficiency [adrenal fatigue, pancreatitis, thyroid issues], leaky gut and mal-absorption, weight loss, MCS [multiple chemical sensitivity]), I don't feel that I have really made much progress in healing, other than that I have gained some weight.  For which I'm very grateful.

I am still dealing with gut issues involving cyclic nausea and food intolerances.  And as a result of adrenal fatigue, I have no real capacity for dealing with stress.  Everyday occurrences or changes to my simple schedule cause me to fall apart.  If you are familiar with the term "stress window," mine is basically nonexistent.  I struggle with being in large groups and find I "recharge" in solitude as opposed to with people, as I always have.  It is strange to feel as if I've turned into an introvert, and I miss "me."

In the midst of what we understand to be wrong with me, it seems that there must be an unaddressed underlying cause for all of these issues that simply has not been discovered yet.  My blessed doctor continues to explore options that come to his attention, and currently we are looking at two possible causes for which testing is available.  One is SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth) and the other is mold poisoning.  I will be talking with him probably next week about what comes next.

We would greatly appreciate your prayers as we mine these new ideas for clues as to what is actually going on in my body.  We hang onto the knowledge that God reveals mysteries from the darkness and brings the deep darkness into light (Job 12:22), and our trust is only in Him.

I would also really appreciate prayer for my family as we walk this path.  It is hard on all of them.

Bless each of you for your commitment to pray for us.  In talking or corresponding with many of you, I am so thankful for your continued prayer.  I can't imagine where we would be without you.

I Will Carry You....

Here's a link to my latest post over at "The View From Innisvale"

Another Update.....

"He reveals mysteries from the darkness

And brings the deep darkness into light."

Job 12:22

 

Awhile back, I used this verse in a post.  This morning in my reading, I came across it again.   It's interesting to me that it falls in the midst of a bunch of verses which are rather on the negative side about God's activity among men (you might want to read Job 12 to get what I mean).  There in the middle of them is this very bright, illuminating verse.  I like that.  Kinda like life sometimes.

My doctor visit on Friday was good on a number of fronts.

 

First, my symptoms and situation are a puzzlement to Dr. Matt.  When he prayed for me, he also prayed for wisdom for himself as he tries to figure out what's going on.  I love that.

Second, he had some ideas about how to reduce the nausea.  Eliminate some supplements, add others, change my diet.  

Third, an herbal approach, which I have been pursuing, sits well with him.

Since the change in supplements beginning yesterday, I have had two much better days.  Much less nausea and that is encouraging.  I also slept really well last night, the first time in a couple of weeks.  Simple blessings.

I also wanted to give you a brief update on Daniel and his family since the accident in July.

It has been a long haul for them.  Daniel lost his job due to inability to work, was pretty non-functional most of the time and walked like an old man.  In the process of going to chiropractors, massage therapists, physical therapists and neurosurgeon specialists, he gathered a lot of information about healing.  About a month or so ago, he came across a book by Pete Egoscue called "Pain Free."  He started doing the exercises for lower back and within hours he was doing better.  Progressively over the following few days, he improved amazingly.  He also discovered Kettlebell training, and is now swinging a 35 pound kettlebell with ease, is able to wrestle with his brother and son, and is walking normally again. Praise God!

Sarah delivered their daughter, Ava, on October 17th and will now be able to have MRI testing done to determine the state of her back. 

The thing that is so encouraging to me, beside the fact that Daniel is getting well,  is that if these exercises have had such a dramatic impact on him, I feel there is hope for me, as well.  I am in the process of learning the Egoscue Method, and will keep you posted.

Thank you for your continued prayers.  It has been a rugged few weeks, and it is awesome to have had some relief in these past 2 days.

Bless you, each one.

Update

Shall I take from Your hand Your blessings
Yet not welcome any pain?
Shall I thank You for days of sunshine
Yet grumble in days of rain?
Shall I love You in times of plenty
Then leave You in days of drought?
Shall I trust when I reap a harvest
But when winter winds blow, then doubt?

Oh let Your will be done in me
In Your love I will abide.
Oh I long for nothing else as long
As You are glorified.

Are You good only when I prosper
And true only when I’m filled?
Are You King only when I’m carefree
And God only when I’m well?
You are good when I’m poor and needy.
You are true when I’m parched and dry.
You still reign in the deepest valley.
You’re still God in the darkest night.

So quiet my restless heart,

Quiet my restless heart.

Quiet my restless heart in You. 

As Long as You are Glorified
From the "Come Weary Saints" album

He is God over all.  All things.  All the time.  I have to work at remembering this sometimes.  I have to work at looking up.  Now is one of those times.

In the past few weeks, my stomach issues have intensified.  I am weary of trying to figure it out.  Nothing seems to be consistent other than just being nauseated most of the time and experiencing dizziness and foggy thinking after eating.  Today is particularly difficult.  I have an appointment with my naturopath tomorrow.  I haven't seen him for quite awhile.  Please pray with us that he will be able to figure out something.  We are hoping for a breakthrough.

Thank you for praying with us.  

Prayer Update 9

Dear Ones,

I have been feeling the need to return to my old blog and chronicle my days there again.  I wanted to let you know that I will be focusing my writing in that location and welcome you to join me there if you so desire.  I will come over here and post prayer requests as they arise, but will primarily be there on a day-to-day basis.

This is my post for today: Paradigm Shift

Thank you for your amazing commitment to praying for us through these difficult months.  We are not through them yet, certainly, and covet your continued prayers for us.

How you can pray:

~ Continued revelation on how to treat my issues.

~ My need to slow down, dial back and learn to "be" rather than always "do."

~ Dale would like me to have an MRI to rule out any other "unknowns" that might be revealed by that procedure.  I will be talking to my PCP soon.

Prayer Update 8

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden,

and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28

"Do you not know? Have you not heard?

The Everlasting God, the LORD,

the Creator of the ends of the earth

Does not become weary or tired." 

Isaiah 40:28

I'm liking the contrast in these verses......the weary and tired are asked to "come unto Me" for rest, to Him who does not become weary or tired.

I'm pretty weary and tired.  I need rest.  And it is in Him.  I'm trying to find my way there.

One of the things I'm pondering is what I feel is a dichotomy in how I look at, pray about, and emotionally handle my infirmity.  On one hand, Scripture commands that we pray for healing in a number of ways, doing spiritual battle over the sick and infirm, calling for the elders, etc.  On the other, He says, "My grace is sufficient."  How am I to know in which situation I am?  Do I keep fighting, or do I, in my weariness, accept that this could be my life now, and quit fighting?  I'm tired.  I desire rest and peace.

There are many things that contribute to my questioning.

First, I don't want to be sick.  I want to be well, able to do the simple things that constitute my days.  I'd like to be able to take my grandkids to the park and really play.  Or take hikes and play frisbee with my kids.  So on that level, I want to fight to be well.

But, second, I don't want to be found fighting against my God, if this is in His plan for conforming me to the image of His Son.  I don't want to be standing in His way as He perfects me.

Third, if I am to keep fighting, how do I go about that? There are multiple facets to that:

1. The financial angle.  We have run through thousands of dollars trying to find causes and treat them.  We have been successful on some levels, most notably identifying the mold problem (multiple chemical sensitivity) and getting out of that environment.  And also in determining that many of my issues lie in endocrine insufficiency.  However, in order to keep up doctor visits and treatment, we have to cover those costs outside of insurance.  It's overwhelming.

2. Do we keep looking for other causes via testing through traditional medicine that are covered by insurance, or do we continue to wait it out? My symptoms are many and varied.  On top of that, they come and go, they morph, new ones continually crop up, and there often seems to be no rhyme or reason to them.  I try new supplements and treatments and often they help.  Other times they cause more difficulties.  Are the difficulties part of healing?  For weeks, my stomach can be going along fine, and then I am beset with nausea again accompanied by the old "I'm being poisoned" feeling, and I'm back to trying to find a cause.  What did I eat?  What did I do differently today?  Yesterday?  Same kind of thing with my back.  Most recently, I am having multiple joint pain, especially in my knee, that makes it hard to do a lot of very simple things.  Where is that coming from?  Is it part of detox and something I need to wait out?  How do we find out?

Fourth, I'm just tired.  Tired of trying to figure things out.  Tired from the drain on my body.  Tired of fighting.

I want to be handling this season of my life in the Lord.  What does He want of me?  How would He have me respond?  What is His purpose?  And there are days and days when I just don't have a clue.

I so appreciate your prayers for me.  For us.  We are greatly blessed.

How you can pray for us:
~ Eyes to see and ears to hear His plan and voice.

~ A heart to understand His purposes and what He wants of me.

~ A way forward if He wants us to continue to pursue medical evaluation and treatment in any vein, traditional and/or natural.