Another Update.....

"He reveals mysteries from the darkness

And brings the deep darkness into light."

Job 12:22

 

Awhile back, I used this verse in a post.  This morning in my reading, I came across it again.   It's interesting to me that it falls in the midst of a bunch of verses which are rather on the negative side about God's activity among men (you might want to read Job 12 to get what I mean).  There in the middle of them is this very bright, illuminating verse.  I like that.  Kinda like life sometimes.

My doctor visit on Friday was good on a number of fronts.

 

First, my symptoms and situation are a puzzlement to Dr. Matt.  When he prayed for me, he also prayed for wisdom for himself as he tries to figure out what's going on.  I love that.

Second, he had some ideas about how to reduce the nausea.  Eliminate some supplements, add others, change my diet.  

Third, an herbal approach, which I have been pursuing, sits well with him.

Since the change in supplements beginning yesterday, I have had two much better days.  Much less nausea and that is encouraging.  I also slept really well last night, the first time in a couple of weeks.  Simple blessings.

I also wanted to give you a brief update on Daniel and his family since the accident in July.

It has been a long haul for them.  Daniel lost his job due to inability to work, was pretty non-functional most of the time and walked like an old man.  In the process of going to chiropractors, massage therapists, physical therapists and neurosurgeon specialists, he gathered a lot of information about healing.  About a month or so ago, he came across a book by Pete Egoscue called "Pain Free."  He started doing the exercises for lower back and within hours he was doing better.  Progressively over the following few days, he improved amazingly.  He also discovered Kettlebell training, and is now swinging a 35 pound kettlebell with ease, is able to wrestle with his brother and son, and is walking normally again. Praise God!

Sarah delivered their daughter, Ava, on October 17th and will now be able to have MRI testing done to determine the state of her back. 

The thing that is so encouraging to me, beside the fact that Daniel is getting well,  is that if these exercises have had such a dramatic impact on him, I feel there is hope for me, as well.  I am in the process of learning the Egoscue Method, and will keep you posted.

Thank you for your continued prayers.  It has been a rugged few weeks, and it is awesome to have had some relief in these past 2 days.

Bless you, each one.

Update

Shall I take from Your hand Your blessings
Yet not welcome any pain?
Shall I thank You for days of sunshine
Yet grumble in days of rain?
Shall I love You in times of plenty
Then leave You in days of drought?
Shall I trust when I reap a harvest
But when winter winds blow, then doubt?

Oh let Your will be done in me
In Your love I will abide.
Oh I long for nothing else as long
As You are glorified.

Are You good only when I prosper
And true only when I’m filled?
Are You King only when I’m carefree
And God only when I’m well?
You are good when I’m poor and needy.
You are true when I’m parched and dry.
You still reign in the deepest valley.
You’re still God in the darkest night.

So quiet my restless heart,

Quiet my restless heart.

Quiet my restless heart in You. 

As Long as You are Glorified
From the "Come Weary Saints" album

He is God over all.  All things.  All the time.  I have to work at remembering this sometimes.  I have to work at looking up.  Now is one of those times.

In the past few weeks, my stomach issues have intensified.  I am weary of trying to figure it out.  Nothing seems to be consistent other than just being nauseated most of the time and experiencing dizziness and foggy thinking after eating.  Today is particularly difficult.  I have an appointment with my naturopath tomorrow.  I haven't seen him for quite awhile.  Please pray with us that he will be able to figure out something.  We are hoping for a breakthrough.

Thank you for praying with us.  

Prayer Update 9

Dear Ones,

I have been feeling the need to return to my old blog and chronicle my days there again.  I wanted to let you know that I will be focusing my writing in that location and welcome you to join me there if you so desire.  I will come over here and post prayer requests as they arise, but will primarily be there on a day-to-day basis.

This is my post for today: Paradigm Shift

Thank you for your amazing commitment to praying for us through these difficult months.  We are not through them yet, certainly, and covet your continued prayers for us.

How you can pray:

~ Continued revelation on how to treat my issues.

~ My need to slow down, dial back and learn to "be" rather than always "do."

~ Dale would like me to have an MRI to rule out any other "unknowns" that might be revealed by that procedure.  I will be talking to my PCP soon.

Prayer Update 8

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden,

and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28

"Do you not know? Have you not heard?

The Everlasting God, the LORD,

the Creator of the ends of the earth

Does not become weary or tired." 

Isaiah 40:28

I'm liking the contrast in these verses......the weary and tired are asked to "come unto Me" for rest, to Him who does not become weary or tired.

I'm pretty weary and tired.  I need rest.  And it is in Him.  I'm trying to find my way there.

One of the things I'm pondering is what I feel is a dichotomy in how I look at, pray about, and emotionally handle my infirmity.  On one hand, Scripture commands that we pray for healing in a number of ways, doing spiritual battle over the sick and infirm, calling for the elders, etc.  On the other, He says, "My grace is sufficient."  How am I to know in which situation I am?  Do I keep fighting, or do I, in my weariness, accept that this could be my life now, and quit fighting?  I'm tired.  I desire rest and peace.

There are many things that contribute to my questioning.

First, I don't want to be sick.  I want to be well, able to do the simple things that constitute my days.  I'd like to be able to take my grandkids to the park and really play.  Or take hikes and play frisbee with my kids.  So on that level, I want to fight to be well.

But, second, I don't want to be found fighting against my God, if this is in His plan for conforming me to the image of His Son.  I don't want to be standing in His way as He perfects me.

Third, if I am to keep fighting, how do I go about that? There are multiple facets to that:

1. The financial angle.  We have run through thousands of dollars trying to find causes and treat them.  We have been successful on some levels, most notably identifying the mold problem (multiple chemical sensitivity) and getting out of that environment.  And also in determining that many of my issues lie in endocrine insufficiency.  However, in order to keep up doctor visits and treatment, we have to cover those costs outside of insurance.  It's overwhelming.

2. Do we keep looking for other causes via testing through traditional medicine that are covered by insurance, or do we continue to wait it out? My symptoms are many and varied.  On top of that, they come and go, they morph, new ones continually crop up, and there often seems to be no rhyme or reason to them.  I try new supplements and treatments and often they help.  Other times they cause more difficulties.  Are the difficulties part of healing?  For weeks, my stomach can be going along fine, and then I am beset with nausea again accompanied by the old "I'm being poisoned" feeling, and I'm back to trying to find a cause.  What did I eat?  What did I do differently today?  Yesterday?  Same kind of thing with my back.  Most recently, I am having multiple joint pain, especially in my knee, that makes it hard to do a lot of very simple things.  Where is that coming from?  Is it part of detox and something I need to wait out?  How do we find out?

Fourth, I'm just tired.  Tired of trying to figure things out.  Tired from the drain on my body.  Tired of fighting.

I want to be handling this season of my life in the Lord.  What does He want of me?  How would He have me respond?  What is His purpose?  And there are days and days when I just don't have a clue.

I so appreciate your prayers for me.  For us.  We are greatly blessed.

How you can pray for us:
~ Eyes to see and ears to hear His plan and voice.

~ A heart to understand His purposes and what He wants of me.

~ A way forward if He wants us to continue to pursue medical evaluation and treatment in any vein, traditional and/or natural.

Prayer Update 7

"He reveals mysteries from the darkness

And brings the deep darkness into light."

Job 12:22

I was looking for something God's Word had to say about mysteries tonight, because that's where I am right now.  All this health stuff is as good as a mystery.  I was taken by this verse....  "He reveals mysteries from the darkness and brings the deep darkness into light."

Well, inside my body -- everyone's body -- is dark.  Deep darkness, actually, because no light can shine very far inside my skin.  Kinda like a deep cave when the lights are turned out.  And what is going on inside of me is not readily apparent.  To me, a mystery.  There is comfort here, because Job says that God reveals mysteries from the darkness and brings the deep darkness into light.  That's what I so desire right now.  The mystery of what is going on inside my body to be revealed in His light.

Yesterday I was able to talk with my ND and we worked through the current symptoms of new and unexplained back & abdominal pain, increasing joint pain and my inability to gain weight.  He had some ideas about what might be going on and possibilities for tackling the issues.

Most pressing is this back pain right now.  Because of the nature of it, he thought it might be disk related and recommended that I be checked by x-ray to either confirm or eliminate that possibility.  This morning was a difficult one, and I went to Urgent Care to have that imaging done.  The results show no significant disk issues.  The radiologist will be reading the films also, and I should hear tomorrow if there is any nuance that the doctor missed.  According to labs, there is no infection present, nor does there seem to be any issue with bladder or kidneys.  So.  Mystery.

Because there is abdominal pain associated with the back pain, I've begun to wonder if there isn't more intestinal stuff going on rather than structural.

We talked about my joint pain probably being detox-related and some treatment options for that, as well as possibilities for why I still can't gain weight, and some treatment options there, too.  I'm working to effect those additions as quickly as possible.

Last night, Jessie gathered some precious saints who came and prayed over me.  It was a rich time of sharing in Scripture, prayer and song.  One of the things that stood out to me, perhaps to many of us, is that God's priorities are not always ours.  His priority is always the inner man, the inner fruit, and if He says 'no' to a request of mine, it's because He wants to focus on my inner man.  My relationship with Him.  So, at this point, that is my assumption in this journey on which I find myself.  He is working on my inner man, and the outer is going through some tough stuff.  Mysterious stuff, for which medicine is having a hard time finding cause.

That is my update for now.  My heart is desiring a revelation of the mysteries of what is wrong in my body, whether they be rooted in physical, emotional and/or spiritual causes.  I would so appreciate you joining in praying with us in that regard, but more than that, that His work in me would be fruitful.  That His reasons for saying 'no' right now to healing would not be fruitless in my life.  That His work would be accomplished, and that I won't stand in the way.  He has promised to complete the work He has begun and conform me to the image of His Son, and I don't want to be a hindrance, you know?

Thank you for praying with us, still.  :-)  You are all precious to me.

How you can pray:

~ Revelation of the mysteries of my illness, in His timing.

~ That His priorities will be accomplished, in spite of me, if necessary.

Prayer Update 6

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Hebrews 13:8

Comfort words for me in this time where change is the watchword.  Where things don't have any constancy.

The past week has been an example of the wild fluctuations in how I've been feeling.  Last Monday was an awesome day.  I felt better than I have in a very long time.  Tuesday started a downhill run that is still in process. I keep thinking I'm on an upswing, and then really difficult stretches jump out at me.

Yesterday I started having back pain unlike any I've ever had.  A deep breath will instigate it and it extends from my lower back around my sides.  I don't have a clue as to the source.  I am not holding adjustments for any length of time and although I went again today to get put back "in," it is not helping the pain.  I also have an increasing joint pain issue, primarily in my knees and shoulders. 

My gut has been "off" for a couple of days and it may be that there is inflammation that is contributing to my back issue.  It kinda feels that way, but I have no idea, really.  The joint pain could be the result of detoxification, but again, I really don't know.

I have a note in to my ND asking about these things and hope to hear from him when he has a chance.

I would so appreciate prayer that there will be some light shed on the current issues as well as why there are such dramatic ups and downs in how I feel.  And I would really like to avoid having to go to a doctor here, or worse (in my thinking) to the hospital.

On a positive note, Dale found a small pickup that is working so well for him.  It was a God-thing finding it and He has blessed us greatly.  Thank you for your prayers for this over the past months!

And a bright spot today are these sweet pansies

my dear husband brought to me.

How you can pray:

~ Light shed on the cause of these dramatic ups and downs and the current back and joint pain.

~ That I won't have to go to a local doctor or the hospital.

~ That my ND would be able to get back to me soon.

~ Perseverance and joy in trials.

Thank you so much for praying.  We are very grateful.

Prayer Update 5

"To everything there is a season,

and a time to every purpose under heaven...."

Ecclesiastes 3:1

I am hanging onto the truth of this passage right now.  And I'm grateful for His peace and assurance that it IS true.

On Thursday, I tendered my resignation at the Post Office.  It was hard and tearful, but I know it was the right thing to do.  The relief of stress is so very apparent.  Until I made the decision, I didn't realize how much it was affecting me every day.  So much of my energy was focused on trying to be ready to work on Saturdays, and in the past month I have failed to be able to work even one of them.  It was taking a toll on me at a level of which I just wasn't aware.  So, while it's hard, I am glad that the result is very noticeably less stress in the mix.  So, that season of my life is over for now.  If God has another similar position for me in the future, I will rejoice in that, and if not, I will rejoice in whatever He brings my way.

It continues to be wonderful living in our new place.  We are now able to do laundry here and wash everything that smells of mold.  The washer has been going just about non-stop since Thursday.  I'm not sure I've ever been so grateful to do laundry.

There is not much new health-wise at this point.  Still feeling as if I'm on a general upswing being out of the mold and enjoying better digestion, but remaining in the place of neither being able to gain weight nor depend on how my back will be any given day.  I started a new supplement this past week and have had no adverse reactions to this point.  This is one that works at the cellular level in helping with detoxification support and increasing glutathione levels.  Dr. Matt has written a post on his blog about glutathione and you can read it here if you like.  It's amazing to me.  Because of dealing with multiple chemical sensitivities (MCS), the detox issue is big.  So, we'll see over the next months if this helps.  I'll also be starting another supplement this week which is to help with adrenal support.

Thanks for checking in with me here.  I am humbled and blessed by how many of you are praying for us, and am so, so grateful.  Bless each one of you!

How you can pray:

~ That the relief of stress over job-related things continue to have a positive effect in my overall well-being.

~ Weight gain.

~ That the 2 new supplements will do good things both at the cellular level and for my adrenals.

~ Dale still needs a rig.  :-)