A reward for His suffering......

"May the Lamb that was slain

receive the reward of His suffering."

1st Moravian Missionary

On Sunday, our teaching time was used to watch and listen to a video of revival preacher sermons.  One of them was Paris Reidhead, who preached the famous sermon "10 Shekels and a Shirt" which concludes with the quotation of one of two Moravians who had sold themselves into slavery in order to reach slaves who would otherwise never hear the gospel.  As they sailed away from their loved ones, never to return, he called back to them, "May the Lamb that was slain receive the reward of His suffering!"

That is our reason for being.  Jesus's reward for His suffering.

This has been in my mind all week.  We, His beloveds, are the reward of His suffering.  Every soul who comes to a saving knowledge of Him is the reward of His suffering.  That is an amazing thought which is settling into my heart.  And recognizing that I am the reward of His suffering enables me to see new ways in which I belong to Him.

Last Friday my health took a turn for the worse.  My gut has just come to a point where it doesn't really like anything in it.  I'm dealing with nausea most of the time, as well as light-headedness and dizziness.  My weight has dropped again.

After doing some more research on SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth), my original belief that it isn't a factor has been challenged.  There are many markers that indicate it would be wise to test for it.  I found a doctor at a clinic in Portland who specializes in SIBO, and the lab provides a SIBO hydrogen breath test that I can do at home.  That was a huge relief, because the test requires a 12 hour fast, involves drinking a sugar substance and then taking breath samples over a 3-hour period.  Having to drive somewhere on a fast, being in a strange place and sick from the sugar substance, and then having to drive home again was keeping me from actually going and getting the test done.  Yesterday I went to Portland to pick up the test kit and will be conducting it on Monday here at home.  From there I will have the opinions of two doctors as to the results.

If SIBO is the problem, it will involve both specialized antibiotics and a tailored diet.  Diet stuff doesn't bother me anymore.  I'm so limited as to what I can eat now, it really doesn't matter.  :-)  Antibiotics are always a concern for me because of my Candida history, but this is worse than what I went through 25 years ago, and I have to trust that a SIBO specialist will guide me through the mine field.

My emotions are up and down.  I'm seeking to draw near to the One Who calls me "Beloved" and feel Him draw near to me. He reminds me daily to seek Him. Seek Him at every turn.  So I'm trying to sink into that mindset.  Let go of me and embrace Him.

One other thing that is on our hearts and minds is that the company for which Dale works is having difficulties with solvency.  His job is in jeopardy, with the very real possibility that the company will have to close down.  Prayer for another job solution, should that happen, would be greatly appreciated.

How you can pray:
~ That the SIBO testing will be definitive and conclusive.
~ That this specialist will be someone with whom I can work comfortably.
~ Perseverance!
~ Dale's job.

Thank you all for praying.  You are a great blessing to us.

Update

Though the fig tree does not blossom

and there is no fruit on the vines,

though the product of the olive fails

and the fields yield no food,

though the flock is cut off from the fold

and there are no cattle in the stalls,

yet I will rejoice in the Lord.

I will exult in the victorious God of my salvation!

The Lord God is my strength,

my personal bravery,

and my invincible army.

He makes my feet like hinds' feet

and will make me to walk --

not stand still in terror, but to walk --

and make spiritual progress

upon my high places of

trouble,

suffering,

or responsibility.

Habakkuk 3:17-19

(Amplified)

Awhile back I listened to a few tapes by Beth Moore about overcoming fear.  The whole deal was based on these verses.  I loved what she had to say

It's all Him.  Strength, bravery, the army.  He is victorious no matter what.  And on top of everything that He is, He empowers me.  He makes me to walk, NOT stand still in terror, but to walk and make spiritual progress on my high places of difficulty.  Trouble. Suffering. Responsibility.  Whatever is overwhelming me.  All things that are overwhelming me.

So my devotional book, "Jesus Calling" by Sarah Young, said the same thing about a month ago, right in the middle of one of the most difficult times I can remember, and He says this:

"When things seem to be going all wrong, stop and affirm your trust in Me.

Calmly bring these matters to Me, and leave them in My capable hands.

Then, simply do the next thing.

Stay in touch with Me through thankful, trusting prayers,

resting in My sovereign control.

Rejoice in Me -- exult in the God of your salvation!

As you trust in Me, I make your feet like the feet of a deer.

I enable you to walk and make progress upon your high places of

trouble, suffering, or responsibility."

I love how He affirms things He's taught me in the past.  Kind of a refresher course.

Back in June, we discovered that there was a possibility of mycotoxin poisoning as an underlying cause for all the stuff that is wrong with me.  I went through a bunch of tests again, and in the end result, they are simply not conclusive.  None of my autoimmune markers are showing any problems, all of the hormone tests come back normal (now that one is a mystery!), etc., etc., etc.  I have been on a mycotoxin treatment protocol for about two months, but there is no real difference.  I'm still cycling with good days followed by bouts of flu-ish nausea with no rhyme or reason or pattern involved.  My doctor is puzzled.  I'm beyond puzzled.  We don't really know where to go from here.  

The only possibilities that we haven't explored are testing for SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth) and testing for mold in our house.  After reading about SIBO, I really don't exhibit the symptoms and there is no lab around here that does the test.

As far as testing the house for mold, we are seeking the Lord as to what He would have us do about that.  It's expensive and we don't really know if it will be conclusive either.  So many things haven't been.  But it could be and might answer the question of whether I may be experiencing re-infection over and over again, and therefore the human mold treatment protocol isn't really making any progress.  So many unknowns, still.

So, our prayer request at this time is for wisdom about testing for environmental mold or other contaminants.

Thank you so much for your prayers.  As I've said before, I can't imagine where we'd be without you.

A New Path.....

Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

Psalm 119:105

When I was about 11 years old, before I knew the Lord, I went to JOY club once a week after school at a neighborhood home.  The JOY stood for Jesus, Others & You.  Mostly, we memorized Bible verses and recited them and won little prizes.  I remember sometimes working on my verses with a friend during recess.  Psalm 119:105 was one of the first.  Isn't it cool how the Lord interweaves Himself in our lives before we even have a clue?!

So, lamps and light, and a new path.  We SO need His light.

The nutshell version of this new path is that, after conferring with my doctor, we are pursuing mycotoxin (mold poisoning) testing and treatment.  There is a lot involved with it, it's expensive, it will take endurance and perseverance on my part and a lot of counting it all joy.

We covet your prayers as we wait to hear which mold testing center is considered best by the environmental doctors, and then just for the fortitude to do this thing, as well as resources.

We know He has it covered.  We're looking for that Word-Light He has promised will light this path.

Thanks so much for praying.  We appreciate you all so much.

A little catching up.....

Well, it has been a year since the original 40 Days of Prayer was started by my dear daughter, Jessie.  Isn't that amazing?!

I've had it on my list for quite awhile to blog here and give you all an update, and today seems to be the day.

After about a year of treatment for the various issues that have been discovered (endocrine insufficiency [adrenal fatigue, pancreatitis, thyroid issues], leaky gut and mal-absorption, weight loss, MCS [multiple chemical sensitivity]), I don't feel that I have really made much progress in healing, other than that I have gained some weight.  For which I'm very grateful.

I am still dealing with gut issues involving cyclic nausea and food intolerances.  And as a result of adrenal fatigue, I have no real capacity for dealing with stress.  Everyday occurrences or changes to my simple schedule cause me to fall apart.  If you are familiar with the term "stress window," mine is basically nonexistent.  I struggle with being in large groups and find I "recharge" in solitude as opposed to with people, as I always have.  It is strange to feel as if I've turned into an introvert, and I miss "me."

In the midst of what we understand to be wrong with me, it seems that there must be an unaddressed underlying cause for all of these issues that simply has not been discovered yet.  My blessed doctor continues to explore options that come to his attention, and currently we are looking at two possible causes for which testing is available.  One is SIBO (small intestinal bacterial overgrowth) and the other is mold poisoning.  I will be talking with him probably next week about what comes next.

We would greatly appreciate your prayers as we mine these new ideas for clues as to what is actually going on in my body.  We hang onto the knowledge that God reveals mysteries from the darkness and brings the deep darkness into light (Job 12:22), and our trust is only in Him.

I would also really appreciate prayer for my family as we walk this path.  It is hard on all of them.

Bless each of you for your commitment to pray for us.  In talking or corresponding with many of you, I am so thankful for your continued prayer.  I can't imagine where we would be without you.

I Will Carry You....

Here's a link to my latest post over at "The View From Innisvale"

Another Update.....

"He reveals mysteries from the darkness

And brings the deep darkness into light."

Job 12:22

 

Awhile back, I used this verse in a post.  This morning in my reading, I came across it again.   It's interesting to me that it falls in the midst of a bunch of verses which are rather on the negative side about God's activity among men (you might want to read Job 12 to get what I mean).  There in the middle of them is this very bright, illuminating verse.  I like that.  Kinda like life sometimes.

My doctor visit on Friday was good on a number of fronts.

 

First, my symptoms and situation are a puzzlement to Dr. Matt.  When he prayed for me, he also prayed for wisdom for himself as he tries to figure out what's going on.  I love that.

Second, he had some ideas about how to reduce the nausea.  Eliminate some supplements, add others, change my diet.  

Third, an herbal approach, which I have been pursuing, sits well with him.

Since the change in supplements beginning yesterday, I have had two much better days.  Much less nausea and that is encouraging.  I also slept really well last night, the first time in a couple of weeks.  Simple blessings.

I also wanted to give you a brief update on Daniel and his family since the accident in July.

It has been a long haul for them.  Daniel lost his job due to inability to work, was pretty non-functional most of the time and walked like an old man.  In the process of going to chiropractors, massage therapists, physical therapists and neurosurgeon specialists, he gathered a lot of information about healing.  About a month or so ago, he came across a book by Pete Egoscue called "Pain Free."  He started doing the exercises for lower back and within hours he was doing better.  Progressively over the following few days, he improved amazingly.  He also discovered Kettlebell training, and is now swinging a 35 pound kettlebell with ease, is able to wrestle with his brother and son, and is walking normally again. Praise God!

Sarah delivered their daughter, Ava, on October 17th and will now be able to have MRI testing done to determine the state of her back. 

The thing that is so encouraging to me, beside the fact that Daniel is getting well,  is that if these exercises have had such a dramatic impact on him, I feel there is hope for me, as well.  I am in the process of learning the Egoscue Method, and will keep you posted.

Thank you for your continued prayers.  It has been a rugged few weeks, and it is awesome to have had some relief in these past 2 days.

Bless you, each one.

Update

Shall I take from Your hand Your blessings
Yet not welcome any pain?
Shall I thank You for days of sunshine
Yet grumble in days of rain?
Shall I love You in times of plenty
Then leave You in days of drought?
Shall I trust when I reap a harvest
But when winter winds blow, then doubt?

Oh let Your will be done in me
In Your love I will abide.
Oh I long for nothing else as long
As You are glorified.

Are You good only when I prosper
And true only when I’m filled?
Are You King only when I’m carefree
And God only when I’m well?
You are good when I’m poor and needy.
You are true when I’m parched and dry.
You still reign in the deepest valley.
You’re still God in the darkest night.

So quiet my restless heart,

Quiet my restless heart.

Quiet my restless heart in You. 

As Long as You are Glorified
From the "Come Weary Saints" album

He is God over all.  All things.  All the time.  I have to work at remembering this sometimes.  I have to work at looking up.  Now is one of those times.

In the past few weeks, my stomach issues have intensified.  I am weary of trying to figure it out.  Nothing seems to be consistent other than just being nauseated most of the time and experiencing dizziness and foggy thinking after eating.  Today is particularly difficult.  I have an appointment with my naturopath tomorrow.  I haven't seen him for quite awhile.  Please pray with us that he will be able to figure out something.  We are hoping for a breakthrough.

Thank you for praying with us.